So what’s the etiquette on waiting for dinner if a kid is in the ER? It’s already 7:00 pm and three of us are hungry.
I don’t think the rest of us should be denied pizza because someone might’ve broken his arm during soccer try outs. Is that wrong of me?
My dad once dropped a running chainsaw on my mom’s face. For realz! (blade side UP thank god) Broke her nose. At the ER he was worried about the speed of the exam. He wanted to make it to our weekly Saturday night family dinner.
Yes, we went to dinner straight from the ER.
Passed the audit!!!!
A. You can ONLY answer Yes or No.
B. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone messages you and asks.
Been arrested? NO
Kissed someone you didn’t like? Yes
Slept in until 5 PM? Yes
Ran a red light? YES
Been suspended from school? No
Experienced love at first sight? Yes
Totaled your car in an accident? NO
Been fired from a job? NO
Fired somebody? YES
Sang karaoke? YES
Pointed a gun at someone? No
Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t? YES
Caught a snowflake on your tongue? YES
Kissed in the rain? YES
Had a close brush with death? YES
Seen someone die? YES
Played spin-the-bottle? YES
Smoked a cigar? YES
Sat on a rooftop? YES
Smuggled something into another country? Yes
Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes? Yes
Broken a bone? NO
Skipped school? YES
Eaten a bug? YES
Walked a moonlit beach? YES
Rode [on] a motorcycle? YES
Dumped someone? YES
Lied to avoid a ticket? YES
Ridden in a helicopter? NO
Shaved your head? NO
Made your boyfriend/girlfriend cry? No
Eaten snake? No
Had Mexican jumping beans for pets? YES
Puked on amusement ride? NO
Seriously & intentionally boycotted something? YES
Been in a band? NO
Been on TV? YES
Shot a gun? NO
Gave someone stitches? No
Ridden a surfboard? NO
Drank straight from a liquor bottle? YES
Had surgery? YES
Taken by ambulance to hospital? NO
Peed behind a bush? YES
Donated Blood? YES
Grabbed an electric fence? Yes
Eaten alligator meat? No
Killed an animal when not hunting? No
Peed your pants in public? YES
Snuck into a movie without paying? YES
Written graffiti? No
Still love someone you shouldn’t? Yes
Been in handcuffs? No
Believe in love? YES
Sleep on a certain side of the bed? No
You know what’s super awesome? When the company auditor makes a surprise visit when you’re in charge.
Super super awesome.